Girlfriend from home "probably doesn't exist"

An independent inquiry has concluded that, despite the constant references of
Chris Hunt, his girlfriend from home does not exist.

The inquiry was conducted in Sarah's room, with Clare and Kate in attendance.
Evidence for the girlfriend was given by Clare, who pointed out that Chris has
a picture of her with his arm around her on his desk, and he is always going on
about his "girl from home", and the difficulties of maintaining a long distance
relationship. 

Prosecuting, Kate pointed out a number of inconsistencies in Chris' story and
actions.  Firstly, in the six weeks he has been at Warwick, he has not been to
visit her once.  He never seems to call her or get calls from her, and she has
not seen any letters to Chris apart from his bank statements.  Although there
is one picture of a Chris and the girl in his room, it could be his cousin or a
friend or something.  Further, he has no other pictures of her in his room.

Kate alleged that the girlfriend was a sham, and that Chris was a pathetic
loser for inventing an imaginary lover.  She went on to further allege that he
had probably never gone out with anyone in his life, although no evidence was
offered for this claim.  Proceedings were briefly brought to a halt after Clare
argued that he wasn't that bad, maybe he had his reasons, and that she thought
he was quite cute.  Sarah called for order as the inquiry erupted into chaos at
this outburst.  When order was eventually restored, Clare retracted her
statement, and went red. 

Summing up, Sarah stated that it had been shown beyond reasonable doubt that
this girl was a load of bollocks and that Chris was a crap lier.  She continued
that as yet no motive has yet been established for this deception.  Inquiries
into the private lives of Chris and other members of their kitchen will
continue most days before Eastenders.